Curious Case of Benjamin Button

This movie was broadcast in 2009.  Finally, I saw it today.  Being true and inspiring, the messages embedded are especially touching for people who are confused about life and experiencing problems.  Many crises had Benjamin experienced - losing the loved ones, fearing death, being angry with his sick father who had abandoned him as a baby, being afraid to change, facing the ups and downs - from each he learnt more about life.

This movie reminds me of the book ‘7 People you met in heaven’, and if I had seen this movie years before, I might have been crazy about it.  However, after all these years, having accumulated my own life stories and developed insights towards life, I have to say the messages, though important, are nothing new to me.

Still the life messages are noteworthy and I am reminded to let go, to be courageous, to love wholly and have no regrets and to taste and enjoy every bit of life.

When I am angry of someone, I might say to myself,

“You can be mad as a mad dog at the way things went, you can swear and curse fates, but when it comes to the end, you have to let go.”

When I face problems and want to give up, remember

“You never know what is coming for you.”

Life is unpredictable and it’s of no use to mourn ‘if it had……’

"Sometimes we're on a collision course, and we just don't know it." and “If only one thing had happened differently……”

Don’t worry about how much longer you’ll live, just live it fully and live without regrets.  Here we have

“How much longer I’ve got?”  “Just be thankful that you’ve been given here.”

“It’s never too late to be where you want to be.”

“There’s no time limit.  Start when you want.”

“You can change or stay the same.  There are no rules to this thing.”

“Make the best of your worst time.”

Love the ones you love fully.  When they leave, remember

“We’re made to lose people we love, how else would we now how important they are to us?”

Despite all the great messages, the way the messages are presented can be fine-tuned. I don’t especially like the casual or even indulgent way the characters handle sexual relationship and the part about visiting brothels.  Those scenes are unnecessary and add nothing to the movie, except the feeling that enjoying life means being indulgent. 

I would have liked this movie more if these subjects had been handled more carefully.

BTW, it is still a cool movie to see, especially when you are confused about life and you are still young.

愛國的方式

最近有很多愛國教育的爭議。每次聽到，心情也忐忑，心也隱隱作痛。

獄長足下一些國家，到過不同的地方，就更在意自己的「身份」。最記得的是到蘇格蘭的那一次。當時那個英國人問及獄長有關九七回歸的事。老實說，真的害怕他繼續追問下去，因為……對這個題目，根本沒有思考很多，也並不關心。可以說，獄長留意自己國家的歷史文化，也只是由那時開始。

獄長感恩自己在香港出生，享受較少的不公平及接近清廉的政府管治，感受過努力能改變命運的年代。亦因如此，就更明白中國內地的不足及缺憾。然而，這並不代表獄長不喜歡中國，不愛自己的國家。就如父母兄弟，自己的國藉、背景、文化是不能改變，亦沒法掩飾的。因此，我們要做的不是掩飾，而是做好自己的本份，讓國家好起來、讓人家感受到中國人的傳統及優點，真正地喜歡中國，認同中國人。

這也不代表要造假。我們要做的，是真的要讓自己能「光宗耀祖」，發揚自己國家的優點，改善自己的弱點。

 不喜歡人家說，中國人無禮，在公共地方大叫，沒考慮他人感受。我們可以做的，不是告訴人家，我不是中國人，是香港人；而是做好自己，讓人家知道自己是中國人，並且是有禮的中國人。(不禁又想起在山東一程中，跟姐姐談及日本人及中國人的對話。)

記得聖經上哥林多前書有關「愛」的一節。

愛有恩慈……

不作害羞的事，不喜歡不義，只喜歡真理……

凡事包容，凡事盼望，凡事相信……

很有意思的一節。

若應用這個定義來談論「愛國」，就意味著我們要仁慈地看待自己的國家，不能苛刻;

為著自己的國家，不作不合宜或魯莽的事;

我們不喜歡不義，所以當它有不對的地方，我們要用愛心說誠實話，溫柔合宜地把真相說出，為的是要把不對的改正過來;

我們包容它的缺點，卻盼望及相信能夠改變。因此，默默地耕耘，盡好本份，慢慢地把缺點改正過來。

這就是獄長愛國的方式。

Yesterday Once More

After all these years, when I see this movie again, I can’t help sobbing. 

Diagnosed with leukemia, Husband found an excuse to divorce Wife and plotted the robbery of a necklace Wife loved to make her believe that he was still alive.

The climax is near the end when the reason of the divorce slowly reveals.

When Wife called Husband and she had to choose between knowing where Husband was or where the jewellery was.  Every time, Wife chose to ask about the jewellery, except this time.  Husband asked, ‘are you going to ask where the jewellery is?’  Wife paused and repeated, ‘where are you?’  Husband smiled and hanged up, feeling relieved and satisfied.  Husband was content because finally he was sure that his wife loved him more than the jewellery.

Both of them loved each other, but they lied to each other from time to time in order to win.  They didn’t trust each other even when another one was telling the truth.  Heartbreaking, huh?

What they were doing is dramatic but in our real life, for how many times we lie to those we care for different reasons?  Or for how many times we have not shown our feelings because of fear, fear of being a loser?

3 Idiots

Glad…I have finished a long-awaited movie 3 Idiots.

My friends persuaded me to see this movie while I was the busy struggling with my lessons, extra lessons and marking. 

Today, a few months later, I finally have the chance to see this inspiring comedy movie.  It is about the college life of three students Rancho, Farhan and Raju in the prestigious college the Imperial College of Engineering (ICE). 

Farhan is an ordinary student talented in photography but is destined to study engineering to fulfill his father’s dream.  Raju is from a poor family with a diseased father, a mother who sacrificed her whole life for the family and a sister who never marries because of their poverty.  Rancho is from a rich family.  He has passion for engineering and loves learning.  What’s more, he is gifted with creativity and always thinks out of the box. 

The movie is about how Rancho challenges the current educational system which puts much emphasis on rote learning and neither fosters students’ creativity nor encourages students to make use of their knowledge to solve problems.

For sure, Rancho is lovable.  He is brilliant, kind-hearted and brave.  He always knows what is the most important when things happen.  He always sees the root of a problem and finds easy ways to solve it.  When a servant said he did not learn because he did not have money.  He replied that what he needed was only a uniform.  When everyone was waiting for a space in the public bathroom, he said what he needed was only water. 

He is also kind-hearted.  When he saw a classmate being frustrated, he secretly helped him finish his work, wanting to give him a surprise and encouragement. 

His bravery is admirable, too.  He never lets fear stop him from doing anything.  When he encounters problems, he says to himself, ‘all is well’.  He thinks if he believes all is well and kicks away the fear, he will be more capable of tackling a problem.  With this magic phrase, he overcomes one obstacle after another.

It reminds me of the book Money oder das 1001 des Geld (小狗錢錢) introducing the power of ‘a success diary’ which helps us overcome our fear and empowers us with self confidence.

Generally, I like this movie, which is fun and inspiring in a way.  As a teacher, I like the message about the meaning of studying in a school.  He is right.  Students come to school to learn and not only to rote-learn or to get high marks.  The reminder ‘to follow our hearts and be excellent in what we like, rather than follow success, as success will come by itself if excellence is achieved’ is also amazing.  I agree with it.  I am sure that by doing what we like and work wholeheartedly, we would excel in it and success would follow.

I am lucky as I have the chance to do what I like.  Though I have not excelled yet, I know I will.  I despise those who do not try their best to do a good job and I respect those who do.

On the other hand, I don’t totally agree with what the three idiots did.  Farhan damaged Professor Viru’s car; Rancho embarrassed Professor Viru the first day when Viru gave a speech and he changed the speech script, ruining the ceremony.  He might be smart and the education system might need to be improved, but it does not mean he could break any rules as he likes.  He would also have had less trouble if he had shown more respect. 

As a teacher, I have this reflection for myself.

Help students explore their talents and interests;

Help them overcome fear and take up the courage to pursue their dreams;

Remind them about the love of their parents who may not understand their dreams;

Help parents build up trust in their children;

At the same time, remind students to be humble as ‘they may not always be right’

and

Teach them to respect rules as they are there for a reason.

作個好牧人

終於閱畢何國萍所著的做個好牧人。

雖然不是基督徒，卻也得到不少啟示。亦發現了自己不少不足。

書中最讓獄長受益之一節，是有關耶和華的無私的愛(Agape)。當中引述了聖經的經文．．．．．．愛有恩慈、凡事包容、不輕易發怒、不喜歡不義、只喜歡真理．．．．．．喜歡這節經文，卻也感到害怕和驚訝。因為當中包含了獄長的弱點。這個弱點，可能就是一直讓獄長不得要領的原因。

最喜歡的一句是「愛有恩慈」，它提醒著教師們不能苛刻，也不能草率，以柔制剛。還有的是：「凡事包容」卻「不喜歡不義，只喜歡真理」。包容？是包容學生的惡行嗎？不是。包容是指寬恕和接納，盡力保護孩子。而「不喜歡不義，只喜歡真理」是提醒著我們要用愛心說誠實話，挑戰學生價值的偏差。讀著這篇，獄長腦海內浮現不少身邊的好老師的點滴，他們都做到呢！對說話直接的獄長來說，卻是一個挑戰。

有關「建立關係」一節，提到犯錯的孩子改變，很多時不單單因為道理和知識。他們肯付出及堅持改變，是因為他們感到改變的需要，他想自己變得更好，不希望相信他們的人失望。這么重要的一點，不知何時，卻給遺忘了？

感謝把此書送給獄長的好朋友，她也是一位好教師 - 溫柔卻嚴謹的一位教師。究竟何時，獄長才會像她一樣呢？

不是基督徒，但也感受到耶和華這位好教師的真理及堅持。說到這裡，又不禁想起另一位讓人尊敬的教育家 － 堅持真理、卻溫柔的孔子。他們都有著好教師的共通點 – 溫柔卻嚴謹。

不是基督徒，卻想對耶和華的事蹟知多一點點。

一向崇洋，卻想閱讀更多有關孔子的事蹟。

在To read的名單中，又多了一些項目……

A Simple Life

Touching and moving……

A simple but realistic story plot…….

The elements leading to success…….

Finally, I have time to enjoy this award-winning movie A Simple Life.

Roger, a spoiled master who has always been taken well care of, came back home one day, discovering his little loving elderly maid Tao had suffered from stroke.  While he was thinking about hiring a MAID to take care of Tao, Tao claimed that she wanted to move into a nursery home and insisted her decision, saving Roger all the worries and ‘troubles’.

The story goes on to tell the final years of this caring, old, little lady in the nursery home, revealing the respect, love and care of Roger for his ‘maid’.  With exquisite development, Hui reveals how love changed Roger to an attentive godson from a spoiled and careless master.  

One of my favourite scenes is when Roger visited Tao after her stroke.  Tao was unable to eat because she could not control her left hand.  She resorted to eating with her right hand alone but failed.  Not willing to show how clumsy she was, she stopped eating.  We expected Roger to offer to feed Tao, but to our surprise, Roger asked if the food was not tasty.  Funny, huh?  A spoiled and careless master - not even be able to notice why Tao could not eat. 

That’s why we are impressed as Roger became more caring – a result of his love for the tiny maid.

When a resident asked if Roger was Tao’s son, Roger, said ‘no’ without thinking.  We see how disappointed and nervous Tao was.  Being more attentive, Roger noticed Tao’s nervousness and announced that he was Tao’s godson, rather than her young master and Tao immediately revealed a contented and relieved smile.

People, especially the elderly, can be very simple.  They don’t mind sacrificing themselves to make your life easier. They understand your difficulties.  Still they want to be loved and thought of.  Their self esteem comes from how much care they receive. 

Tao insisted that she was moving into a nursery home because she understood Roger was busy and would not be able to take care of her.  Two of the most frequent lines by Tao are ‘That’s okay.’ and ‘Don’t need to come if you are busy.’  She said so to make her young master relieved, as our caring parents and grandparents.  However, don’t trust them.  Visit them even though you are busy.  One or two hours is all they want.

For how many times, we hesitate to show our love and our gratitude.  Recently, I have had one similar encounter.  My sister reminded me the need to show our care to really enlighten the life of those we love.

Thanks, sister.  One reminder for all of us.  We need to be strong and capable.  Only with strength and wisdom, we could take good care of our loved ones.